Quite the over exaggeration to some - not really to me! Having trudged through another 9 hour shitstorm of total and utter bureaucratic monotony, I find myself returning home completely spent of life with a measly couple of hours to myself, doing things more important to my wellbeing than supplying the demand of the ravenous consumer on behalf of the bastard son of Wal-Mart.
Today, I sat in the grey sludge filtered world of the canteen. I sat there with a pounding headache brought on from retinas burnt through the artificial, fluorescent strip lighting that sears overhead from morning to evening, the constant burn of tiered refrigeration units combined with dry and cold air-con, hoards of screaming kids and nattering imbeciles and the never ending ritual of stacking the never replenished towers of banana and potato crates.
I often sit back on the sofa panning the canteen; dubbing the sound of tumble weed and fluttering shutters over the scene in my head. Generally, it is very fitting. A lifeless, sterile and baron wilderness sparsely populated by withered and enervated members of staff who have taken on the chameleonic shade of beige as their backgrounds.
However, today, as I pan the landscape, something sticks out. Protruding from the normally immutable scene. From amongst the tables of grazing staff drones, a sternly faced manager marches directly towards me with an air of importance. This is a man on a mission. He is now pulling up his sleeve to reveal his watch. He doesn't look at it, but its obviously the opening gesture to his announcement.
"I have been informed that you are due back?" He says, as though it were a question.
"Nope, started the hour break at quarter past, its only 3 - got 15 mins still"
"3:15 ?? 3:15??" He says twice, trying to comprehend the unusual addition of 15 minutes.
"I started at 2:15, so my break ends at 3:15", I respond.
"Oh! Hmm... well why did you take your break so late?!", as he struggles to understand.
"Ugh, because thats when the guy before me finished his break - doesn't matter it's just 15 mins, I'll just go back to work now" I say, finally getting frustrated at the enormity this mundane event seems to have taken on.
"Oh no, finish your hour if thats when its over" he says while fidgeting and slightly mumbling as though his brain is quickly trying to conjure up a something more to say.
He doesn't need to say more, I realise what he is getting at. I realise what he is doing is trying to enforce some kind of regulations that are supposed to be in place. I realise this added 15mins has loosened his preferred tight working schedule up.
Its only been a few seconds since his last words, but the fact he has not started to walk away combined with the fumbling means he feels I actually do not realise and he needs to hammer the point home by saying something a little more. I help him by giving him a line to respond to - either that or I just want him to hurry up and end the stupid bureaucratic showcase.
"Sorry, I didn't realise we had to finish our lunch break by 3 on the hour", I said politely.
"Oh yes, certainly... certainly" He finally says whilst walking away and pretending to look at his watch repetitively in quick succession.
I realise I took what seems like a very long winded route to describing that altercation which in real-time actually only lasted about 30 seconds - but it at least reflects how much my brain made of such a seemingly small situation, allowing me to manage to stew and fester over it in my thoughts for the rest of the day. Getting through a shift in that subhuman world of subhuman costumers and subhuman co-workers is depressing enough to make that one hour lunch break the one thing to anticipate and subsequently feels like the one lousy 'hiding-place' I have. That event more or less obliterated the idea of the hiding place, the untouchable zone, the hour of rest, the 'leave me the fuck alone' part of the day.
Yea - I let these little things grind me down too much, but at least I can feel a bit better resting assured I am not that managerial figure who seems to have an almighty abundance of meaningless things to worry about for each second of the day.
Goodnight corporate world - sleep tight making sure all emergency exits are clearly lit, free from obstruction with hi-vis vests and hard hats worn at all times - and not forgetting to SMILE :P
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